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We’re back at it again with another “How to Make Money Like Person X” guide, because despite our recent success, we still haven’t stacked our cash high enough. Want to learn how to make money like JAY Z? Click here.

Want to learn how to make money like President Donald Trump? Keep reading.

Before we get started, I can already feel the controversy brewing. Dear readers, put down your MAGA AR-15s or #Resistance pitch forks.

This isn’t about politics. This isn’t about Russian bots or building the wall. And this certainly isn’t about Trump’s tremendous ability to president. Or not. No, this is about one thing, pure and simple: Making money!

It doesn’t matter if you love him, hate him, or are reading this from Canada because you are now an American expatriate who couldn’t bare the thought of living in a country run by a former reality TV star.

Set aside your political and personal views, because there is one thing about Donald Trump we can all kinda sort of completely almost agree on; he probably is, or at least was at one point, very wealthy… to some extent.

An Actual Guide on How to Make Money Like President Donald Trump?

As in the previous post in this series, no. I once again will be taking real quotes on money from the Teflon Don himself, and interpreting them to fit my own narrative. The goal? To shed a little insight into the financial mind of one of America’s most controversial figures, and also to get invited to next year’s #FakeNews awards!

This is gonna be uuuuuuge!

“Your money should be at work at all times.”


Trump is out of his mind, that is the most ridic…


That actually makes a ton of sense and is very reasonable financial advice.

Alright, calm down, it wasn’t that great. Put that money to work to buy some oats for your high horse.

In all seriousness however, it’s sound advice. That is exactly how the rich get richer. By constantly redeploying their capital into ventures generating the best returns. They are always on the lookout for another opportunity to increase their wealth, and they are also always fully invested watching their money grow.

Even when it represents a conflict of interest and divesting is the only ethical thing to do…

“Sometimes your best investments are the ones you don’t make.”


Wow. That’s deep. This really came from the same guy that gave the world “covfefe“?

When it comes to money, it really is all about trade offs. Whether you have one hundred dollars or one hundred million dollars, you still need to make choices of what to do with that money.

Sometimes avoiding a potential loser and leaving cash on the sideline is the right choice. And sometimes it’s just about having that money free and waiting for a better opportunity that may come along. Imagine how much money Sneaky Falcon would have now if we didn’t make some of those regrettable investments!

“Getting rich is easy. Staying rich is harder.”


Three for three on pretty solid money making tips. This is clearly a commentary on the ever-changing market environments, the constantly mounting competition in the business world, and the need to continuously improve to stay ahead. You can’t rest on the back of one success; you must always work hard to stay successful.

Or, stay with me here, but maybe this was just a factual anecdote from the life of Donald Trump:

“Getting rich is easy.” That is certainly how I would describe getting handed trusts, guaranteed loans, and business contacts from your rich daddy. The quickest route to millions is inherited wealth.

“Staying rich is harder.” Sure is when you are always filing for bankruptcy.

“The concept of global warming was created by and for the Chinese in order to make U.S. manufacturing non-competitive.”


Uh… whaaaat?

I am not even sure how to unpack a takeaway from this one. Completely fake broadly agreed upon science to crush your competition?

Just string together words into a semi-coherent sentence and become leader of the free world?

Make America Great Again?

Eh… just use some or all of the above to make money like President Donald Trump.

“Part of the beauty of me is I’m very rich.”


There we are. And if that doesn’t sum it up. But hey, 3 out of 5 ain’t bad. That’s 60%, which is arguably better than somebody’s approval rating…


Want some actual tips from Donald Trump on getting rich? Apparently there is a book.

Definitely looks like a must-read there.

Starting to notice a pattern here; The best way to make a lot of money is to have a lot of money. I’m guessing that is all of chapter 1 of this book.

As you could tell from this strongly bi-partisan piece, even the money side of our current president is highly polarizing. The non-alternative fact of the matter is, we don’t actually know how wealthy or successful he really is.

He clearly was collecting that sizable Apprentice paycheck, but all of his other ventures (Trump real estate, Trump college, Trump steaks, Trump luxury widgets, etc) all seem mired with controversy.

In conclusion, if you still want to try to make money like President Donald Trump, put that money to work, be patient for a great opportunity, try to stay rich, blame China, and most importantly, just be rich.

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